If you've never been to a Beth Moore event, you have to know that they are fabulous. First, there is just a wonderful atmosphere of being surrounded by hundreds of Christian women. The times of praise and worship are phenomenal and she is simply an amazing speaker. The first time I saw her was in Lexington a few years ago. I didn't really know what to expect and didn't really understand why people were so crazy about going to see Beth Moore. After being there I understood. I don't worship her or put her on a pedestal, but I do think she is a very gifted Bible scholar and speaker. I also saw her, along with Kay Arthur and Priscilla Shirer, at a Deeper Still Event a couple of years ago.

Now, imagine this great event designed especially for ministers' wives! I enjoy getting together with ministers' wives in general, but to do so in this setting is an opportunity I don't want to miss. There is also another event for MWs that Thursday and Friday called "Between Us Ministers' Wives: Called, Equipped, Encouraged." I don't know as much about this, but I'm sure it would be awesome too.

To learn more about these events, go to www.lifeway.com and look under events. You can also go to www.lproof.org which is Beth Moore's site.

I just found out about this today, but I am going to look at my schedule and really hope to go. Not sure I can make the Thursday event, but the Friday-Saturday is what I'm hoping for. If you'd like to go and want to get a group together, let me know. We'll see what the response is and go from there. I'd love to head down to Nashville with some other ladies. And if you've been to an event like this, share your experiences with us.

Ready for a road trip,

Pam

I've got to say that 2008 was a pretty good year and I thank God for that. The kids are doing well and excelling in school. They're not perfect, but overall they are pretty good kids and I am proud of them. Church is great. We are so blessed in that area. After moving around a lot over the years, we've now been in Auburn five years and I have actually made friends and feel very connected to the people and the community. During the Christmas Eve service I looked all around the church as we stood around the edge with our candles and thought of all the people and how much they have come to mean to me. My job is good, we enjoyed a nice, close-to-home family vacation, got to go on a weekend. get-away with my Mom, enjoyed watching the kids play sports and accomplished a few things around the house (painting, new roof, yard work).

Now, while the year was a good one, there were some areas in which I did fall short. Longtime readers may recall a vow at the start of 2008 to loose weight. We started off the year well, got way off track, then got back on for a while and have been off for the holidays. Whew! Anyway, I lost about 10 pounds, but was not consistent. I'm sure l also set a goal for doing better about prayer and Bible study. Well, did well with prayer for a while when our church had a round the clock prayer thing going on. Other than that, still not consistent. Bible study...I did my one's for church, but did not do a good job of just reading my Bible.

So...on to 2009. Once again, my husband and I are both wanting to drop some pounds, eat better and get in shape. We are going back on Weight Watchers and I feel so good about it. We had done it a few weeks right before Christmas and were doing well. But I know we can get back on and, if we give it all to God, we can do it. As for Bible study, our women's class just started a new one, "Running Nowhere in Every Direction." It is about balancing your time and dealing with stress. Sounds like a good one. But it is not very in depth. My personal Bible study goal is to read through the Bible this year. It's been on my mind for a while, but I hadn't really made a committment. Then I was at Lifeway the other day, spending my Christmas gift certificate, and had about five dollars left to spend. I was looking for something around that price, when I noticed a huge display of Read-the-Bible-in-a-Year Bibles. They were normally $24.99, but guess how much they were on sale for. You got it, $5. I got one.

Well, that's me. How about you? Do you dare put it out there for all to see? Do you have some things you'd like to accomplish in 2009? As we share our goals, we can also agree to pray for one another as we try to do what we set out to do.

Ready for a new year,

Pam

Remember a while back I blogged about ideas of things to do for the congregation at Christmas? I've hosted an Open House in the past, but wanted to do something different this year. I remembered my grandmother always made party mix and gave it to friends and neighbors so I decided to continue that tradition. I've worked all day on it, but I'm pleased with the results. We wrote a little Christmas greeting to insert in the bulletin telling people to pick up a bag on their way out. We've been averaging around 200 each Sunday, so I hope I've got enough. My goal was to give everyone a little something. I really do love our people and if I had a lot of money I'd get them all something really nice. As it is, this is the best I can do.

So, how are your Christmas preparations going? Are the Christmas cards sent, the presents purchased and wrapped and the stockings hung? Most importantly, are you ready to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ? All that other stuff, even tons of party mix divided into 209 pretty little baggies, really don't matter in the end. What matters is the gift God gave us and how we respond to that.

Grateful to the best gift ever,

Pam

Sometimes I guess I just wish I could be more involved in the ministry with my husband. I see some of the lay people in church who spend time working there and wonder if some think I should be there more. And as I have come to realize that my ultimate goal has nothing to do with a career but with serving God however He chooses to use me, I long to have more time to spend as a mom and helpmate to my husband. That sounds pretty old fashioned for someone who never really thought much about marriage and was focused on college and career. However, my priorities have changed. Sure, I still have my own hopes and dreams for the future, but I have also realized that the main thing I want for the future is to do what God wants me to do. And since he has made me the wife of a minister, I believe that is something He really wants me to concentrate on.

I know I'm rambling. One thing I'm wondering is this, do most of you work full time outside of the home? Do you feel that takes too much time away from family and ministry? Do you feel like working is your way of being a helpmate? I know that my job is important to our family. I don't make much, but what I make helps and we have insurance through my company. Would you like to stay home and focus more on family and ministry? If you have a work at home job, I'd love to hear about that. And if you do stay home, how do you feel about how that affects you and your family as a famliy in ministry?

OK, I need some feedback here to help me get a better grasp on my own thoughts. Help me out ladies!

Pam

For those who don't know, Shepherding the Shepherd is a pastor and wife retreat sponsored by the Kentucky Baptist Convention. It is held each January in Lexington at the Radisson. You arrive on Thursday and leave Saturday afternoon. This will be our sixth Shepherding, I think, and we love it and look forward to it each year. I've talked about it before, but I'm going to talk about it again. This is a wonderful get away for pastors and their wives. There are large group sessions with great speakers and amazing praise and worship and break-out sessions that cover lots of topics. The atmosphere is so friendly and we always enjoy reconnecting with old friends and making new ones. We always eat way too much of the tasty food (most meals are included in the price). And, most importantly, we just have a great time relaxing together. Friday evening is date night and couples are encouraged to have a night out. How often do most of us do that? Not often enough, that's for sure. And that is the whole point of Shepherding. The wonderful people who put on the event know that life in the ministry is not always easy and that couples need to have time to connect and unwind. I tell you, I am ready to go right now! The good news for me is that we have our reservations. The good news for you is that there are still spots available. Find our more at www.kybaptist.org. Hope to see you there!

Shepherding is our annual get away, but I was wondering if anyone has another? What do you and your husband do to relax together and reconnect?

Share your ideas or if you have Shepherding stories, share those.

Ready to relax,

Pam

Here's where you readers come in...do you have any ideas? Do you have any holiday traditions that you, as the pastor's family, do for your church members at Christmas? I knew one woman who invited the deacons and their wives for dinner. Another hosted a gathering for the senior citizens. These are great ideas, but I want to do something for everyone. Of course, if money were no object I could come up with all sorts of ideas. But this has to be something that won't break the budget. I've thought of filling small gift bags or boxes with some homemade goodies. Or maybe making mini loaves of bread for everybody. Now, we're averaging about 200 on Sunday mornings, so I know no matter what I decide, it will be a bit of work. But I figure having one thing per family is sufficient. Or what about a card with a family picture? I don't know.

Whatever I do, I need to make a decision soon. Christmas will be here before I know it. Help me out with some unique and innovative ideas ladies!

Ready to bake or whatever,

Pam

But I do have a topic of interest tonight and that is night or evening meetings. It goes without saying that everyone is busy these days. I don't really understand that since we have so much technology and modern-day conveniences, but we are busy. For me, the time from when I get home from work to bed time is priceless. It is time to get a lot done (cook dinner, do laudry, pay bills) and be with the kids (see how their day went, make sure homework gets done, take baths, play and read) and perhaps relax (watch a little TV, read or get on the Internet). That sure is a lot for a few hours. For all four of us to be home together is great, but it seems to rarely happen.

Now, it's pretty much a given that in the week of a pastor, and often church goer, Sunday evening and Wednesday evening mean church. We don't have traditional Sunday evening services, but there is usually something going on. Wednesday is our big children/youth program night. So there are two nights. We have small group every other Friday night. Scott has a meeting each Monday evening and almost every other week something pops up on another night. There are weeks where there are only two nights when we are all home together between the hours of 6 and 9 p.m.

I've read that some pastors and church leaders have rule for themselves that limits the number of evenings they are away from home to three or four nights a week, barring an emergncy. Is having your husband home in the evenings a problem for you? Some weeks are better than others for us. If nothing extra is added, our normal schedule is not too bad, but add say a Thursday evening meeting and things start getting out of whack.

Now, I understand that the evening is the time that is best for most people to meet. And I understand that this is part of being a pastor. But I'm just wondering if it is something you all have to deal with. If so, do you have any guidelines about being home as a family in the evenings? I'm always reading about how important the family dinner table is, but it is hard to eat dinner together when one is gone or eats quickly and then runs off.

I guess if anything, knowing that many nights are hectic makes me all the more appreciative of nights like tonight, when we are all home and my husband and kids are in the living room playing Wii while I write this!

Glad to be home,

Pam

First, I love that this clean, Christian, family-oriented can do well at in
theaters. This movie was made for $500,000 (very little in today's
movie-making world) and had earned about $13.6 million last I heard. The theater was packed the night we went. Mostly couples of all ages, and some with children. And the movie had been in the top ten. I didn't check to see how it was doing this week.

Another thing I love is that this movie can actually have a positive influence on the lives of those who watched it. Maybe some people there will become more aware of how important it is to work at making a marriage succeed. Some may have good marriages that will be made better. Some may have marriages that need a lot of help and maybe this movie will encourage them to give it to God and give their marriage all they've got.

I also am loving Kirk Cameron. How many of you watched him on Growing Pains? Me! He really seems to be sincere in his Christianity. He is also very direct in proclaiming Christ. He has a show, The Way of the Master, on one of the religion stations in which he and this other guy talk about the Bible and Jesus and go out witnessing. I'm not much on most religious shows, but I like this one and my husband really enjoys it. I think we should pray for Kirk Cameron and others in Hollywood that Christ will work in their hearts and move others to take a stand.

We all know that the divorce rate in America is high, with something like close to half of all marriages ending in divorce. That's really sad. Another thing that is really sad is that the divorce rate for ministers is about the same as the general population. Why? I don't know. But I do know that it is hard to remain really connected to your spouse in the midst of both people working, children, finances, various activities, etc. Add the stress and pressures of ministry to that, and it's no wonder many ministers end up divorced. But Fireproof focuses on the fact that we should look at our marriages as a covenant not just a contract. And we must work to stay focused on God and on each other.

There are a lot of movies out there to watch. Some are funny, some entertaining, some thought provoking. But Fireproof made me want to be a better Christian and a better wife and that make it tops in my box office ratings.

If you have a chance, go see Fireproof. There are also Bible studies to go with it. Check out www.fireproofmymarriage.com. And if you've already seen it, let me know what you think.

I'm going to avoid the topic of who I plan to vote for and stick to the question of "Why do people assume I'll vote Republican because I'm a preacher's wife?" Is this a regional thing? Has anybody else had this happen? Do you think I'm off base here? Do you think Christians should stick with a certain party?

I'd love to get some good discussion going here. Remember, we can share our different view points here in love and respect one another's opinion. Let me hear what you have to say!

Pam

I'm really glad I did. We are very blessed to be part of a wonderful small group. We may not have the deepest of Bible studies, but we have great fellowship and sometimes we all need that. Especially as a pastor and pastor's wife. This a group we can really be ourselves with. That's often hard to find.

We camped at Mammoth Cave National Park. There nine adults and nine children, ages four to 14. We cooked out over the fire, went to a Ranger program, made smores and just sat under the evening sky and talked and laughed. After two crazy weeks it was nice to just sit back and relax and not worry about what needed to be done. My major concern was roasting my marshmallow to perfection! The next day some went canoeing and others went caving. We all had fun, though the canoe group was pretty exhausted after a long trip. I went on a cave tour with my daughter and a friend and her young son. When we got back to the campsite we just sat and talked while the kids played in the dirt. Very nice.

I'm glad I went camping. It was a great experience for the kids, me and our group. We have memories we will share forever. Those are the kind of things that bind a group together.

So, there are a couple of things to talk about here. First, do you have a small group you are a part of? Tell me about it. Or, do you camp? If so, give me some advice on how to and where to. We had never camped as a family before outside of setting up the tent in a yard, so we're very new at this. We a few in our group who were campers, so that helped. But I'd like to go more often as a family.

Thanking God for my small group and our fun time camping,

Pam

At the Super Saturday session for MWs Saturday, we got to sharing a bit at the end about some things we would like to do in life and I wanted to continue that discussion and the one started here.

I want to know what you want to do in life. Some things may be silly. I shared with the ladies Saturday that I would like to harvest cranberries. They looked at me like I was crazy. I don't want to do it for a career, just once. It looks very peaceful and refreshing to be standing in a flooded field herding the berries. (Surely you've seen those Ocean Spray commercials) Anyway, another woman chimed in that she would like to drive a semi (just once) and another said she would like to ride in a hot air balloon (not just up and down but actually go somewhere). Those are the kind of little things I'm talking about. So, tell us something you'd like to do.

Other dreams may be more serious, life-changing goals. Maybe you want to go back to college. Maybe you want to get you GED. Maybe you've always wanted to go overseas, just for fun or on a mission trip. Maybe you enjoyed art as a young person and always wanted to do something with that talent but chose a more practical profession instead. Many of us have hidden talents and dreams. Why not let them out sometimes? I have lots of things I'd like to do. I love to write fiction and would love to do that more often. I do want to travel. I've always wanted to go to England. I'd also like to go on an overseas mission trip. I want to know some things you all would like to do.

I was reading somewhere that if you write down things you want to accomplish in life, you are way more likely to do those things. Make a life list. Include some things that are fairly easy to do (maybe learn the constellations, read a New York Times bestseller or learn to crochet). Add in some that will take more work (learn to play an instrument, further your education, learn a new skill). And include some that may seem way out there (go on an Alaskan cruise, publish a book, run a marathon).

The Bible says Jesus came so that we might have life and have it abundantly. Here's to living life to it's fullest, and, as Dawn said on the last post, "Here's to dreaming!"

Pam

Watching her has really been inspiring to me. I'm at an age now (37) that when I watch the Olympics, I realize I'm old enough to be the mother of some athletes. When I was a child, I remember thinking "Hey, wouldn't it be cool to be in the Olympics." Now, I find myself thinking, "Hey, wouldn't it be cool to watch your child in the Olympics." Sometimes that change in thinking makes me feel old. Then along comes Darra Torres. She's older than me. And there have been a couple of others I've seen that are in their 30s and 40s. I love them all. I root for those older Olympians no matter where they are from. I think the lady who won the marathon was 30-something.

Now, I'm not saying I think I can make it to the Olympics. But Darra's accomplishments and her words have reminded me that I can still follow my dreams. In following my dreams, I'm also talking about following and doing God's will for my life. I think one thing that distinguishes the Olympic athletes from others is that they are very focused on what they are doing and what they want to accomplish. In my life, I feel sometimes like I am just running around taking care of all the little things that need to be done instead of trying to focus on one big thing? Do you know what I mean? And I think maybe it's often hard for ministers' wives to follow their own dreams. Sometimes we are so busy supporting our husbands as they follow their call (which must surely trump our dreams), that we lose focus of what we have wanted out of life. Or maybe we get busy working in the church or taking care of the kids. Hard to stay focused when there is so much to be done.

I'm not saying that supporting your husband in the ministry, working in the church or taking care of your children are bad things. They are great things. But I know that sometimes I feel like I've lost sight of some things that I would like to do. God has a plan for me and I want to make sure I don't lose sight of that. I know I have at times, but I was recently reminded that I'm not too old to follow my dreams and that is important to remember.

Enjoying the Olympics

Pam

Facebook is a social networking site. It's a place where people can share information about themselves and keep in touch with friends. You can put pictures on there and send messages and that kind of thing. Now, if you haven't noticed, I don't know much about it. I'm on it now for two reasons-- First: the people at KBC thought it might be another way for ministers' wives to connect and I said fine with me. Second: I have two children, 6 and 10, and they'll be getting on these kinds of sites before I know it, so I want to know more about it.

So, blog readers, how about you join me on this new adventure. Beth, one of our bloggers, is already on Facebook (www.facebook.com) so maybe she could give us some more info about how to use this site. And if anyone else is on there, let us in on what you know. Meanwhile, I'll be trying to figure it out on my end. My page is pretty dull right now. I'll try to get with it and add pictures, comments, more profile info and such.

Like I said, I'm pretty clueless right now. But one thing I do know is that I like to connect with other ministers' wives, so if this is a way to do that, I'm for it!

Finding my way on Facebook,

Pam

I need to get back on schedule with church things as well. Didn't have any kind of Bible study going over the summer, so I've been terribly off in that. I am so bad about just reading the Bible. If I'm in a study, I do it, but if not, I don't. That's a failing of mine and really there is no excuse for it. Just one of many things about myself I need to improve. Also haven't had a lot of couple time lately. That's hard all the time with busy schedules and kids, but in the summer, it was even harder. The kids staying later cuts down on the little time we have alone together after they are in bed. Even if we're just sitting on the couch watching TV, it's nice. And then summer is busier with ball games and taking the kids to various baby sitters. Seems like I have seen my husband kind of coming and going lately and that's about it.

So, Wednesday, we'll start school and get back into somewhat of a routine. Minister's families often have crazy schedules throughout the year, but we can have a bit of a routine, as long as we're flexible. Our church is starting a Bible study on prayer, so I'll get back into that. And my husband and I have purchased a new devotional book to try out. I'll let you know how that goes.

What about you? Are you glad the summer is nearing and end or longing for just a little bit longer? Guess that depends a lot on your perspective. The kids are moaning while the parents are rejoicing!

Getting back in the swing of things,

Pam

If you have ever been in that situation, you are not alone. If you're a pastor's wife, you've most likely been a sermon illustration at least once and most likely more than once. Right or wrong, our husbands just can't resist using us to illustrate certain points they want to make. And, hey, who can blame them. We are pretty interesting people. But sometimes, they may go too far and share TMI. Scott has mentioned me many times and most of the time I don't really mind. Of course, when he mentions me, it means many eyes turn to me and I must put on my smile and laugh at whatever he is saying or make a face like "that crazy guy" or whatever is appropriate. There have only been a couple of times when he's said something that I would rather he would not have said and it wasn't anything much. I can't even remember one, but the other was just something about how I can't grow plants and kill everything or something like that. It just sort of hit a nerve, but nothing major.

So, how do you feel about being used as an illustration? Do you think your husband should ask before mentioning you in a sermon? Have you ever been upset about something he's told while preaching?

This all leads me to a great video parody by some fellow preachers' wives. I found this link on a great pastors' wives forum (www.pastorswivesonline.com) and it it too funny. Check it out at

http://spectrummagazine.org/blog/2008/0 ... ay_youtube

or

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iY4khRpG8O8

Still laughing,

Pam

Looking forward to seeing some of you,

Pam

Once again, I've got to say that time just flies by. Summer is a crazy time with no schedule. Tonight I told the kids that they had to settle down soon after coming home from VBS. They've been staying up way late. My son goes to Cub Scout day camp tomorrow through Saturday, and I don't want him to be exhausted (and rotten). So they are in their rooms now, settling down.

Another topic on my mind is a mission trip. I have never been on a mission trip but I have long wanted to go. Well, there is an opportunity to go to Haiti in September. My husband is going. I am still deciding and I'd appreciate your prayers in this. Here's the deal. I want to go if it is what God wants me to do. I don't want to go just because it's a chance to go on a mission trip out of the country. Does that make sense? Part of me says, of course God wants me to go, I'm just hesitant because while I want to go on a trip like this, I'm also nervous. What if I don't know what to say or what if I'm just in the way? What if I'm just not good at interacting with people in a different culture? Then I argue back to myself that that is just the Devil trying to put doubts in my mind. (Boy, am I rambling!) So, you can tell I'm going back and forth on this issue. Then, there is the thing that is always an issue...money. The trip costs $900 per person. That's $1,800 is we both go. (And yes, that is the exact amount of our tax stimulus rebate and part of me goes, well there's the money. Unfortunately, we already spent some of that on vacation and the rest was to pay off bills.) I also want to make wise choices financially and we took our Crown Financial Class and we know that God wants us to get out of debt, not go further in debt. Scott says we can do it on faith and I believe that God will provide as He has so many other times.

Well, I think that's enough on that. Please just pray that we will have guidance and wisdom as we make this decision. And go ahead and start praying for those who are going to Haiti.

That's what's on my mind...now what about you?

Pam

We ended up spending two days at Holiday World and three days in Louisville. It was all good. I love Holiday World and the kids (and Scott and I had a blast). It was about as relaxing as any visit to an amusement park could be. The crowds were not bad so very little lines. The weather was warm but not scorching. And they have free drinks, so what more could you want really. Though I rode several rides, I think my age is showing in that I can honestly say I really do just enjoy watching my kids have fun. Oh well.

Visiting Louisville was also fun. I got together with some of my high school class mates and their children and we all laughed about the "good old days" and laughed about "look at us now." We visited some of our favorite restaurants and just enjoyed spending time at the hotel-- the kids especially since it had an indoor and outdoor pool.

Though our vacation was far from elaborate, it was very nice (thank you government stimulus check!). We were able to get away and enjoy being together as a family. That is so important for any family, but perhaps more so for those in the ministry. Being a pastor (and his family) can be pretty stressful, even in the good times. A getaway gives us all a chance to relax, regroup and reconnect. I am truly thankful that we had that time together.

Now, back to reality, of course. Both of us go back to work tomorrow. The kids go back to their normal summer days. And things will quickly get busy as VBS starts in seven days. Yikes! I'm not quite ready to start back on my routine. That's why tonight, though I'd meant to look over my VBS materials, I think I'll just kick back and watch TV. After all, it's my last night of vacation.

Still relaxing,

Pam